Steven, Why Won't You Call Me?!

Oh, because it's illegal for us to be together. And you respect the law, but I like that about you.

Ohemgeez, allow me to act like a creepy twelve year old for like five minutes. Ten minutes tops. So Steven, AKA just Steve.. well, we've never met. At least we haven't yet. Okay, on the real, we probably never will. But, my dear friend Emma told me about this cute Mr. Steven, whom she met through shows and bands, and that kind of stuff. And like any other teenage girls would do in their free time, we Facebook creeped this Mr. Steve. From Facebook creeping we established that he a.) has an ugly girlfriend, (whose life we must ruin) b.) wears tight ass rocker jeans and v necks, c.) plays the drums, (he bang 'em hard) As we're trolling this lad, I realize that he goes perfect with the Ke$ha song "Steven." Emma transformed herself to a hipster, drum playing, tight ass rocker pant wearing Steven, and we proceeded to make a tribute.

Steve, if you ever come across this you should know how to get a hold of me. And I want to eat your last name. (For security purposes I didn't mention Steve's last name.)

Stay chill and gorgeous Steve,  xoxo.